I’m second guessing this teaching thing

The odds are against me, this may not be meant for me, or it’s a simple sign saying, “Hey, you aren’t suppose to be teaching!” Whatever it is, I don’t know if I’m going after the right thing. I’m so close, yet so far away from landing a job. All I lack is a license and I should have that in July. No later than August!!!!

April 9, I went to my interview. It went so well. I was skipping out of the office and down the hall. Totally confident that I will get my license the first week of May like they said. Downside was I had learned that April 18 was the next test date I can sign up for, but I had registered to enter a climbing competition. It was a big conflict of interest and I had to go with climbing. The next test date was May 30. Test results take a month. Once I get notice that I passed I must send an add form toward my license plus $10. Then a couple weeks later I get a new license. I’m guessing that will be by the end of July. I also learned that day of the interview — on April 9 — that a job fair will be April 29 in OKC and April 30 in Tulsa. Well, ….

Earlier this week a friend asked how the teaching job hunt was going. I replied with the plan to attend the job fair. She raved about how her friend says that’s the way to go about getting a job. I asked for tips and she replie yesterday that I need to prepare a teaching philosophy, updated resume, and have a cover letter. Yesterday, I was working an odd shift, so when I got home I dove right into writing. It took me 3 hours to research and write a teaching philosophy and a cover letter. The resume was a snap. I already updated it. The last time I looked at the time before bed was 12:36am. Then, it took me forever to rest my mind to actually go to sleep.

I woke up around 7:30, but I didn’t get out of bed til 8ish. I got my things together went to see when the Barbershop was open for my haircut and highlight. I wanted to look really nice for this big event and I figured if I go around noon I will be one of the last applicants they will remember. As far as I knew it was a great strategy. Hmm. The Barbershop opened at 10am it took 2 hours for my hair. I didn’t leave my house til 12:45pm. Got to the job fair at 1:45pm. When I walked in there were empty tables and I overheard a volunteer telling another person that about 25 districts left around noon. I only saw 5 tables with representatives. What a waste of my time!!! Oh I was so mad. I went to the tables, gave 3 packets of the 12 I had prepared last night, and only one district was hiring an art teacher. And the ironic thing was that I has already applied through the www.teachers-teachers.com Web site. Great. I take the man’s advice from that district and the flying guiding to the application process online. I checked it out and it’s a lengthy application. I’m doing it tomorrow.

Seriously though, I don’t know if this is what I want anymore. I’m so fed up with rejection. I keep telling myself it’s all part of the process. Someone will hire me. I feel once I get my license I may be worthy of hiring. … Geez, this sucks.